how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize