shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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