so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
