What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
