Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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