She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
