Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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