I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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