So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
