Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
So vagazzling was a success
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
