gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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