Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
smell my finger.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
