I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
