I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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