you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
i think i just lost a toe
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
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