'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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