Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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