I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
