I've blown a few things in my day
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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