youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Randomize
