I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
