shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
