so explain again why im purple
no
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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