Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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