is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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