I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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