Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
