AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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