three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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