I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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