hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
