I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
