omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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