ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
