after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
