i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
