Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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