the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
