Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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