You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Randomize
