I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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