so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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