Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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