i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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