In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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