I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Randomize
