Got a toothbrush?
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
