I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
So much rum. So many feels.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
