i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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