I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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