these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
